Long term or short term?

How women and men think in relationships.

I have been on and off on my dating streak and I have had a lot of instances where I found it tough to comprehend what was running through the guy's mind and why? A lot of men had/have baggage and issues, which they were not able to get out of and I ended up being more of a caring phycologist to them as opposed to a girlfriend. This disappointed me. I was really wondering if I would ever meet a man who was sorted, had dealt with his past, one who is constantly trying to be a better person and respects himself and others as they are. I want to add good communicator to this list too.

But it’s very often that I find men who seemed to have dug a hole for themselves and are just sitting inside it, and what’s worse is that they are comfortable there and they don’t seem to want to get out. I am there giving them a helping hand and they appreciate it, but they are not willing to accept it and move forward with the guidance or support. Or maybe I haven’t tried long enough. But I don’t want to get into the hole with them. That would put me in a spot where I am kneeling down and sitting in the dark with them. I hate doing that. I’ve taken the time, effort and energy to sort myself out, stand out, be positive, give to the world and they expect me to babysit them? HELL NO.

When I asked chat gpt why men were like this and feared explicit communication from the heart. This is what I got:

It’s important to recognize that displaying fewer outward signs of emotion does not necessarily mean that someone is devoid of feelings. Everyone experiences and expresses emotions differently, and it’s essential to approach individuals with empathy and understanding, regardless of how they outwardly express their emotions. Encouraging open communication and creating a supportive environment can help individuals feel more comfortable expressing their emotions, regardless of their gender. Additionally, seeking professional support from therapists or counselors can be beneficial for individuals struggling to connect with their emotions or navigate difficult experiences.

Although it does make sense, it takes lot of empathy to work this way and accept people who don’t give you enough energy. So, my question is, should we date these men and give them a chance? And I have got the answer too. We can hear them out, empathize, accept them and hope at some point they will get over whatever they are going through BUT make sure you don’t date them as you will be pulled down along with them. Because we as women shouldn’t be wasting our energy on people who won’t give back.

Women can indeed exhibit powerful and seemingly boundless energy, just like anyone else. And we use this to help people around us. We care, comfort and nurture. We may demonstrate resilience in the face of challenges and adversity. Whether it’s balancing work and family life, navigating societal expectations, or overcoming personal obstacles, many women show remarkable strength and determination.

Women are often caregivers, whether as mothers, partners, friends, or professionals in caregiving roles. This nurturing instinct can drive them to expend energy on caring for others and supporting those around them. But do we get this energy back? Or do we have to be continuous givers for the rest of our lives?

Many women are driven by passion and ambition in their pursuits, whether it’s advancing in their careers, advocating for causes they believe in, or pursuing personal interests and hobbies. This passion can fuel their energy and drive them to accomplish their goals. We often prioritize social connections and relationships, which can provide emotional support, motivation, and a sense of community. Strong social bonds can contribute to feelings of energy and vitality. We may prioritize self-care practices such as exercise, healthy eating, adequate sleep, and stress management techniques, which can help maintain high energy levels and overall well-being.

Women are often attuned to their emotions and the emotions of others, which can contribute to their ability to navigate interpersonal relationships and communicate effectively. This emotional intelligence can be energizing in social interactions and collaborative endeavors.

It’s important to recognize that energy levels can fluctuate for everyone, and women are not immune to experiencing fatigue or burnout. While women may demonstrate resilience and strength, it’s crucial to prioritize self-care, set boundaries, and seek support when needed to maintain overall health and well-being. Additionally, acknowledging and celebrating women’s accomplishments and contributions can help foster a more inclusive and supportive society for everyone.

So, remember, we as women have the light in us to have full control over situations, provided we use a mindful approach and move into spaces with a sense of awareness and ability to develop clarity, as we tread through any sort of meandering routes. So, I suggest you use this endless energy to live your dreams, achieve your goals, provide to those who deserve it and only settle for a man will be an equal and treat you as an equal, and one who has your back no matter what, as you would for him.